Gahh.My appetite's increased, but at the same time I feel bloated. Even then, I get hungry. And I eat. Which I don't think is good, but it's probably from the steroids. And I'm gonna be exercising and stuff to get myself back to normal. Not too much, though.
I finally moved back upstairs tonight. (This morning?) I just felt freaked out a little. Probably because the room was big. I don't know. I don't like open spaces. I'm afraid of that and the paranormal and I think my meds have been effecting that the past couple weeks. I keep seeing things and it's like "dklfjslf" Sucks. But I'm keeping a positive note and I know I'm going to get better eventually and things will return to normal. My skin just feels weird. Because it was like.. raped. >.> Anyway. It's much better now. It's a little red in some areas and others are tan-ish and my stomach skin is beginning to heal. It's probably going to start peeling a fuckload soon. Maybe that's why it feels weird. The skin is dying and falling off. >.> I dunno man. But whatever it is I hate it. xD 'Least it's not a terrible looking plague anymore, though. I'm so happy.
I'm just craving some Hunter attention. Our parents aren't being very reasonable lately and just yelling. It's like they're all PMSing or something. I blame the shit economy. And I know I'm probably right to.. Speaking of economy, I'm applying for a job at freakin' Brusters. Because I need to pay my siblings back and I fucking hate not having money. Like ferreal I actually want a god damn job. It'd make things so much easier. Instead of sitting there not being able to afford shit I'll have a little money to spend and pay people back with. It's enthusing. And I need to be more productive anyway. And I need to work on my people skills. I have a terrible case of Social Anxiety Disorder. And I supposedly have a great personality. So it'll be good for me. Maybe I'll stop blushing every time I talk to someone new. ._. And I know it's going to happen. Which I can't stand because it'll make me blush harder because I know they notice and I'm being judged. Can anyone give me any help with that? >_> Like keep myself from blushing? It started last year, I think. And I've gotten somewhat better with it, but it still happens..
Anyway. I think I should TRY to get to sleep. See if mommy and daddy Brutal are up first, though... I know they'll help me. And apparently mommy Brutal had a bad dream. But yeah. Thanks for reading, if you did.
Good night.
Hostile
Devious Comments
oh dear, xD
don't ever live with me, and don't ever sleep over at my house haha
anyway, I am really glad you're getting better<3
also, good luck with the job thing. I've applied to 3 places already and nothing. Brekken's applied to probably 20 or so xD and, no job. >.>
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<3Rachael.
RIP Lisa Fontaine, I miss you so much.
the way I cope with it is just think to myself "I don't even know this person, they don't even matter..." etc xD
or imagine them as being a really good friend.
though I just have general anxiety because of PSTD, so it's probably not the same.
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<3Rachael.
RIP Lisa Fontaine, I miss you so much.
Thank you.
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the paranormal is just a big part of my life, I couldn't block it out if I tried.
I've applied to Petsmart, Barnes and Noble, and I'm about the apply to Tropical Smoothie. I srssly feel like I'm whoring myself out. haha
when do you turn 16?
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<3Rachael.
RIP Lisa Fontaine, I miss you so much.
xD Yeahh I said something like that to Hunter. Or I wanted to. o.o Economy suckss. D;
I'll be sixteen at the end of September. :0
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since I was 5 I've been practicing communicating with spirits, and learning everything I can. I know how to mess with people's energy, talk to ghosts/spirits/whatever, send them away, and almost anything you can imagine. I can heal headaches!
and damn, that sucks. >.> I'm 17 and yet no one will hire me.
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<3Rachael.
RIP Lisa Fontaine, I miss you so much.
Fail. u_u
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xD
I am afraid of crabs and being alone in public.
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<3Rachael.
RIP Lisa Fontaine, I miss you so much.
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